


Famous Last Words

by Writerofthelorde



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Baze Malbus & Chirrut Îmwe, Baze Malbus needs a hug, Canonical Character Death, Chirrut Îmwe needs a hug, Chirrut Îmwe/Baze Malbus - Freeform, Cute, Drama, First Kiss, Fluf, Fluff, Force-Sensitive Chirrut Îmwe, Friends to Lovers, Happy, Hugs, Jedi Temple, Kisses, Last words, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Pre-Rogue One, Sad, Sad Ending, Spiritwarrior, Sweet, Temple life, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, Young Chirrut Îmwe, Young Love, avoiding, baze/chirrut - Freeform, calm, chirrut/baze, cursing, man tears, mostly fluf, soft, spiritassassin, young Baze Malbus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-31
Updated: 2017-01-31
Packaged: 2018-09-21 04:02:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9530672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writerofthelorde/pseuds/Writerofthelorde
Summary: AU where the last word you speak before dying is tattooed on your wrist. Chirrut’s word is “Baze” but he doesn’t know that and so he keeps using it and every single time Chirrut says Baze, Baze freezes and then looks around frantically and it worries Chirrut, but he doesn’t press it. Then at some point it just drives him nuts and he asks him.Baze and Chirrut are in their twenties when the story starts. They have been friends since they were teens.





	

A thing that Chirrut noticed, and definitely struck him as weird, was that one day, years into their friendship, Baze started to freeze and then panic every time Chirrut said his name.  
  
“Baze?” He asked as they were sitting on the temple floor, trying to meditate. Baze froze before frantically looking around the room. “Yeah?” He asked still frantic. Chirrut stayed silent, unsure of what to do. “Chirrut?” Baze asked when he stayed silent. “Oh sorry, it’s nothing.” Chirrut said in reply, shaking his head. They both went back to meditating.  
  
“Baze?” Chirrut asked hours later as they stood near their bunkbeds. Baze tensed, looking around frantically and then relaxed again. “Yes?” He answered. “Are you okay?” Chirrut asked concerned. “Yeah.” Baze replied as if nothing was wrong. Before Chirrut could react he already went back to his chores.  
  
“Baze?” Chirrut whispered that night. “Can I sleep here?” He asked before Baze could crawl out of his bunk to check their surroundings. “Yeah of course.” Baze replied, making room for him and then guiding him down into the bunkbed. It was cozy. So cozy that it wouldn’t have been comfortable for most, but these two friends had been through a ton and were so close they just needed each other’s touch sometimes. That and they were both madly in love with each other, but the other wasn’t allowed to know that of course.  
  
Their chests were pressed together and one of Baze’s hands was squished between them, because he tried to rest it on Chirrut’s chest as a sign of concern. “Are you okay?” He asked Chirrut. “Yeah… I just.. I don’t know I feel uncomfortable and I can’t sleep because of it…” He whispered. “Oh?” Baze responded surprised. “Why are you uncomfortable?” “I don’t know.” Chirrut answered honestly. Or perhaps he did know, but that was only a hunch and there were no facts to prove it.  
  
Chirrut snuggled into Baze’s chest and relaxed. “Is this okay?” He asked sleepily. Baze smiled, resisted the urge to kiss his head, and instead ran a hand over his short hair. “Of course it is.” He whispered back. He wrapped his other arm around him and pulled him close. Chirrut smiled against his chest and together they fell asleep pretty quickly.  
  
The next morning when Chirrut woke up he didn't even realise he said his name until Baze froze and quickly opened the sliding door of his bunk to look around as much as he could without pushing Chirrut out of the bunkbed. Chirrut sighed, took ahold if his shirt and pulled him close. Baze's hand moved back to run over his short hairs, before just leaving his hand there.  
  
"How'd you sleep?" Chirrut asked just like he did every day. "Fine, you?" Baze lied just like every day. Chirrut knew that he was lying, he could feel it, but he also felt that Baze didn't want to talk about it and he respected that. Something else he also felt though, was that today it felt like less a lie than usual. He had started to notice how his 'fine night sleep' was a lesser lie whenever Chirrut asked to sleep together. Every night he did crawl in there, even though the space is too small, Baze did seem to feel better.  
  
"Baze?" He asked, trying to get his attention. Baze panicked again but Chirrut moved up with him and placed a hand on his cheek for a mere moment, just to calm him. "Sshh." He had automatically whispered with the movement. Baze calmed down and they lay back down again.  
  
“Baze I know that you..." He trailed off a moment, noticing how this time Baze didn't panic. His heart had panicked for a moment but then it faded away again. "I know how you don't sleep well..." He started.  
  
Baze immediately tried to go against it and didn't even let him finish his sentence. "Shush!" Chirrut exclaimed. "Let me speak." He demanded gently. Baze gave in and nodded, knowing that since they were touching a lot, Chirrut would feel it. "I can feel that you're lying when you say you slept fine, and I can also feel that you don't want to talk about it and I know that and that's fine. I'm not asking you to explain yourself. I just... want to ask you something because of something else I can feel in you.." Chirrut said unsure; very nervous to ask a question like this, but really wanting to as well. He could feel Baze's heart start to race and his face start to heat and Chirrut quickly placed a hand on his chest. "You don't have to worry." He tells him quickly.  
  
"I just..." He started, trying to tell himself he was ready to ask this without getting all awkward. "I can feel that.. when you say you slept fine after a night that I've.. slept here.. with you... that it's less of a lie than it usually is.." He explains. "So.." He continues quickly before he looses the confidence to ask. "Would you like me to sleep here.. more often? Or… every night maybe?" He asked gently, but nervously.  
  
Chirrut could feel Baze warm up inside from his kind requests and it makes him smile brightly. But then Baze laughed awkwardly and shrugged. "No Chirrut you should do what's most comfortable for you." He replied. Chirrut punched him in the shoulder. "No damn it, this is not about me. You need to sleep better and if… if sleeping here or at least being close to you helps then we can do that. It's fine." He said angrily but very very gently.  
  
"Baze, I love you, I want you to sleep well and feel well and be well. So just... You don't have to answer right now, but think about my offer. If me sleeping here, close to you, helps then I'll be sleeping here from now on. That's fine with me." Chirrut tried to hide how badly he also just wanted to sleep with him. Not just because it seemed to help whatever was bothering him, but also because he just loves being in Baze's arms so much.  
  
He could feel Baze brighten up but then his emotions strengthened and suddenly he could feel Baze was close to tears. "What's wrong? What did I do?" Chirrut immediately asked. He moved and placed a hand on his arm and caressed it gently.  
  
"Nothing." Baze grunted with a sniffle. He tried to angrily wipe a tear off his cheek but scratched Chirrut's face in the process. "Krif I'm sorry!" He exclaimed, quickly examining the scratch on his face. He turned on a light and checked out the scratch closely. "It's fine Baze." Chirrut said, trying to pull away one of the hands that was on his face. Baze panicked again and tried to open the wooden sliding door of his bunk, but Chirrut stopped him. "Baze. Relax." He told him. And then he did. Chirrut snuggled close to him and could hear his heart slow down. He closed his eyes, not that it made a difference, and breathed out loudly.  
  
"Do we have anything to do today?" He asked Baze without moving. Baze thought for a second. "I don't think so." He said unsure. "It feels like we're forgetting something though." He added with a frown. Chirrut shrugged in return and just settled in more. He didn't want to admit it, but he honestly just wanted to lay there and hold him and be held.  
  
Baze didn't move and didn't say a word after that. They just stayed in the same position and enjoyed each other’s warmth.  
  
Suddenly someone slid open the door of his bunk. "Hey Baze are you- wow Chirrut you're here too!" Their friend exclaimed. "You're very.. close to each other..!" He teased and Baze tried to punch him in the chest but wasn't able to move much without hurting Chirrut. Their friend knew Baze was crushing over Chirrut and he had told him to just make a move already, but he knew Baze hadn't.  
  
Chirrut was furrowing his brows because Baze didn't panic when their friend said his name. He'd have to keep an eye on that.  
  
In the next following weeks he noticed that Baze only froze when it was him saying his name and no one else. He had also noticed that he would panic most if he ended a sentence with his name and only a little when he started the sentence with Baze.  
  
He didn't understand how Baze could react to the name so specifically. He also felt like sometimes people understood Baze's panic and sometimes someone would even try to calm him. This confused him even further. Not because he minded people comforting him, but because he didn't understand why he needed to be comforted in the first place. He tried to show his worry on his face during these moments but neither of them seemed to want to verbally talk about it so all Baze would do was pull him into a hug.  
  
Chirrut could feel how much Baze loved him. It surprised him that a person could love their friend so much. He could feel that Baze almost loved him as much as he loved Baze. But of course he loved Baze in a different way. Or so he thought.. He never seemed to be able to make the connection though. He was clueless like that.  
  
Chirrut now slept in Baze's bunk every night and he loved it. He wasn't sure if it was helping Baze though.  
  
"Baze?" He asked one night, in the middle of the night. He knew Baze was still awake and to stop his panic he quickly continued. "Is this helping?" He wanted to gesture to the both of them, but had to let go of Baze to be able to do that, and so he decided not to do it.  
  
"Is what helping what?" Baze asked turning to look at Chirrut. "Is me sleeping here helping you sleep?" He asked. "I know that you don't sleep a lot... but is it more than you used to?" He asked softly.  
  
Baze wanted to kiss him. He just wanted to lean in and kiss him and show him how much he loves him because Chirrut clearly cared so much about him and it warmed his heart. Chirrut could feel Baze's heart warm and he smiled. Baze’s love for him fuelled him so much. He still wanted a verbal answer though.  
  
"I do sleep more." Baze told him. "And it does help.” He added with a smile.  
  
“You still don’t sleep much though..” Chirrut said back sadly. “Are you not tired enough?” He asked, but then he felt how Baze started hurting and he quickly continued. “and I don’t mean that in the way that I’m asking you to explain what’s keeping you up, I just mean… I’d like to know if there’s something I can do.. cause if you’re not tired enough we could go.. I don’t know we could spar before going to bed? I don’t know I just want to help you Baze… I want to help you.” He repeated his last sentence the second he realised he was ending his sentence with his name. He didn’t want to make everything worse for him.  
  
Baze wanted to move close, press Chirrut against the wall of his tiny bunk and kiss him and have Chirrut take a hold of his face and kiss him back and god if he would've done it Chirrut would’ve kissed him back in exactly that way… but Baze didn’t know that, and he stopped himself from kissing him. again.  
  
“You do help, Chirrut.” He whispered full of love. He pulled Chirrut just a little bit closer in the hopes that Chirrut would understand what he meant. Chirrut snuggled close and smiled. “Doesn’t feel like it though.” He admitted in the softest whisper that Baze had ever heard from Chirrut. He held him even closer and almost angrily pressed the tiniest kiss into his hair. “You do.” He said sternly.  
  
It was silent for a while, both men were enjoying each others company and warmth. “Do you mind?” Baze suddenly whispered. “Do I mind what?” Chirrut whispered back without moving. It wasn’t necessary for him to move; he couldn’t see Baze anyway, but sometimes he still did, just so Baze could see his face while they spoke. He could feel Baze really appreciated it, but he could also feel that it wasn’t necessary right now.  
  
“Sleeping here.. cause you’ve been sleeping less than you usually do.” He noted. Chirrut blushed a little, which Baze felt against his bare skin. He hadn’t thought that Baze would notice.  
  
“That’s okay though.” He said with a tiny shrug. He hoped desperately that Baze would take his answer and end the conversation, or at least the subject, because he really didn’t want to explain what he meant. Of course his prayers weren’t heard and Baze continued with the conversation anyway.  
  
"What? No it's not okay, Chirrut." Baze replied immediately. "It really is, Baze." He replied and then quickly added, "I love sleeping like this." He mentally face palmed at what his brain made him say in the panic-y moment of ending his sentence with Baze.  
  
Baze moved backwards a little and examined Chirrut's awkward and blushy face. "You do?" He asked surprised.  
  
"Well........ Otherwise I wouldn't've offered?" Chirrut answered in the hopes it would make him drop it. Baze grinned and bit his lip. He could see Chirrut's blush grow and it made him grin even more. He stayed silent way longer than Chirrut liked especially since he could feel Baze's mischievous mood.  
  
Baze just stared at Chirrut's blushing face. He was surprised by his mischievous mood since he was still overwhelmed by Chirrut's statement and still too scared to actually make a move even though Chirrut literally said he loved sleeping pressed up against him. When his mind finally calmed down about the subject his mood flipped.  
  
"Me too." He admitted with a soft smile.  
  
Chirrut moved his head backwards in surprise. "What?" He whispered back.  
  
"I love holding you like this... It calms me." It felt weird for Baze to admit this but it was true and he wanted Chirrut to know that.  
  
Without making fun of Baze or joking about it in any way he just opened his mouth and said, "being held by you calms me." Baze felt touched and smiled brightly. Chirrut moved his hand to Baze's chin and then moved up to feel his smile. Baze let him.  
  
Chirrut could feel how heartfelt Baze's smile was and it warmed him deeply. He wanted to kiss him so bad, but he didn't want to ruin the moment or the evening by kissing him and then getting rejected. There was not a single doubt his mind that he'd get rejected and yet at the exact same time Baze was thinking of kissing him, too.  
  
Neither of them made a move. Instead they just stayed that way and considered their conversation over. They calmed each other and that was all that mattered.  
  
Both men fell asleep quite quickly after and they slept peacefully the rest of the night.  
  
The next following days Chirrut kept trying to stop himself from saying Baze and instead called him, friend. He could feel Baze having mixed emotions about it. Baze kept being both amused and touched by Chirrut calling him friend. He also definitely felt calmer now that he didn’t have to panic every time Chirrut ended a sentence or wanted his attention.  
  
Baze also missed it though; he was so used to Chirrut using his name all the time that he almost felt a little… empty when he hadn’t heard him say his name in several days.  
  
After about five days Chirrut messed up again and instead of panicking he felt that Baze was relieved to hear his name from his lips, again. Baze walked over to him and pulled him into a hug. He didn’t say anything about it though. He really didn’t want to talk about it and Chirrut could feel that, so he stayed silent too.  
  
After this, when Chirrut started to use his name as normal again, Baze became more distant. They still shared Baze’s bunk and both of them seemed to be happy about it, but Baze tried to avoid him during the days.  
  
One night, weeks into their new habit of sharing a bed at night and then barely speaking to each other all day, Chirrut had enough.  
  
“Baze?” He asked, to get his attention. As usual Baze’s heart races, and he looks around frantically, trying to open the sliding door of his bunk to look outside. “Baze, why do you keep reacting that way when I say your name? At first I thought that maybe you had something to hide or that someone was looking for you or something… but Baze you only react this way when it’s me..” Chirrut was getting more emotional than he had planned, but since Baze started to avoid him he had really started thinking this was all his fault.  
  
“What.. what did I do wrong?” He asked as tears overflowed his eyes and seeped down his face. Baze sat up in his tiny bunk and pulled Chirrut up with him. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” He said as he caressed his cheek affectionately.  
  
“Then what is it? You only react this way when I say your name..! I paid attention, Baze..! Every time I say it you panic and when other’s say it you don’t! And sometimes when I say it and you panic with others around they all seem to understand..! What is it that they know and I don’t..! You only started doing this a couple months ago..! All the years before that went fine..! So what happened in the mean time that made you hate me or get scared of me or something..?!” He ranted loudly. There wasn’t a doubt in Baze’s mind that everyone else in the bunks around them had woken up by now.  
  
“Chirrut you didn’t do anything wrong..!” He started, but before he could continue his answer Chirrut intervened. “Then why have you been avoiding me?!” He asked loudly, audibly upset. Baze sighed sadly and then let go of his own tears.  
  
“Chirrut.. please let me explain.” He said softly and rather calmly for someone who’s crying. He took a hold of Chirrut’s face with both hands and sighed, to calm himself.  
  
“I don’t hate you, Chirrut.” He said so bewildered Chirrut would ever think that. “And of course I’m not scared of you either..!” He whispered as he moved one of his hands to caress his head.  
  
Chirrut felt strange, he could clearly feel how sorry Baze was; he was so sorry it almost tuned out Chirrut’s own feelings. He also felt loved by Baze and he felt strange because Baze’s touches were so soft and gentle and genuine that he almost forgot he was upset.  
  
“Baze, will you just tell him already?!” Someone yelled out of a bunk nearby. “I’m trying!” Baze yelled back with a sigh.  
  
“Does everyone know?” Chirrut asked loud enough for everyone around them to hear. A choir of muffled “Yes”s was heard and Chirrut’s heart sank. “Baze… please tell me.” He whispered sadly.  
  
Baze breathed in deeply. “Do you remember that class we got about the words on our wrists?” He asked softly. “Yes…” Chirrut said, not liking where this was going. “So they told us that they found out these words… are our last words, right? And do you remember how everyone in class felt sorry for me…?” He asked carefully.  
  
“Baze what does your wrist say?” Chirrut asked, feeling scared. “My wrist says ‘me’…” He paused for a second. “but that’s not what I’m scared about..” he admitted.  
  
Chirrut sat there for a moment, trying to understand what Baze was trying to say and then it hit him. “Baze… what does my wrist say?” He asked frightened.  
  
“It says… Baze.”  
  
Chirrut breathed in sharply and closed his eyes tightly. “Please tell me you’re joking.” He whispered with furrowed brows.  
  
“I’m not Chirrut. Everyone in class that day felt sorry for me because your last word, will be my name…”  
  
“No…” Chirrut whispered. It all made sense now, but krif he wished he hadn’t known. It hurt too much. But then he realised something that cheered him up. Only a little, but it helped nevertheless. “At least we’ll be together till the end.” He suggested with a sad smile.  
  
“Chirrut… That’s why I was avoiding you…” He admitted. “I think…. it’s best if we stop being friends…” He said sadly.  
  
A group of whats and huhs were heard around them but Baze ignored them. “Chirrut I’m scared… I’m scared of loosing you, but… I’m even more scared of you dying all together. So… I think it’s better if we stop being friends.." He admitted sadly.  
  
"What?" Was all Chirrut could utter.  
  
"I'd rather lose you-" a sudden sob interrupted his sentence. He sighed and then tried again. "I'd rather lose you as a friend and keep you alive, then stay friends and see you die sometime soon. I can't- I can't let you die Chirrut..."  
  
"Why would us being separated help?" Chirrut asked. "Because then you wouldn't have to say my name anymore." Baze said as if it was obvious.  
  
"What makes you think I'd stop saying your name?" Chirrut asked as he shook his head. ”What?" Baze asked not understanding where Chirrut was going.  
  
"Baze, I love you. If you leave I wont stop saying your name..! I'd miss you..! And dear force stand me by I would look for you." Chirrut said in a way only Chirrut could.  
  
"Why would you do that?" Baze asked completely confused.  
  
"God damn it because I'm in love with you, you complete idiot." Chirrut exclaimed with a nervous laugh. They heard several sounds from people in surrounding bunks who were still listening to their conversation, but they ignored them.  
  
Baze didn't know how to reply, but Chirrut could feel Baze's love for him start blazing and that was enough for him to leap forward and kiss him forcefully.  
  
He took a hold of his face with both hands and kissed him feverishly. Baze kissed back immediately, pulling him closer at first and then pushing him away.  
  
"Krif I'm so sorry, Chirrut." He whispered sadly.  
  
Chirrut backed off, thinking that Baze was rejecting him. Baze didn't need to force to know what Chirrut was thinking and quickly leaped forward, and smashed their mouths together in another forceful kiss. He placed his hand on the back of Chirrut’s neck and then calmed their kiss.  
  
"I'm not rejecting you." He whispered after he backed off. "I meant I'm sorry for everything else.. For not telling you... For not telling you about the word on your wrist... and for not telling you… that god I'm in love with you too." He admitted with a sad sigh.  
  
"Then don't push me away..." Chirrut said back, running a hand through Baze's hair and realising how much he loved the feel of it. "Lets do this together. You and I till the end. And lets make sure the end isn't anytime soon. And how about I stop calling you Baze and call you babe instead? Or sweetie, or my love." He grinned and hung his arms around Baze's neck loosely. Offering the nicknames while his mouth was right in front of Baze's.  
  
"The one true love of my life." He suggested with a smirk. "Oh yeah cause that rolls off the tongue nicely." Baze countered sarcastically. "I don't know lets try it." He whispered before kissing Baze deeply and open mouthed.  
  
"It rolls off the tongue just fine." Chirrut told him after he backed away. Baze didn't know how to reply. He didn't know how to feel or what to think except that he was the happiest he'd ever been.  
  
“Baze, I'm strong. I will get stronger. I'll be able to protect myself just fine." Chirrut said to try to sooth the fright that was still deep in his heart.  
  
"And I will train more to be able to protect you too." Baze promised.  
  
"But please..." Chirrut pleaded. "Don't push me away again..."  
  
"Never." Baze promised.  
  
  
The years went on that they continued to be together and continued to train to become better at defending themselves and each other. Chirrut became so good and so confident with himself that he became a little reckless much to Baze's annoyance. But as long as Chirrut didn't end a sentence with his name, he was alright. He knew Chirrut could take care of himself and when his last word had been something else he would be calmer about the situation.  
  
Of course he knew that Chirrut could easily get hurt really bad and then say his name and then still die, but he had become the best assassin he possibly could be and had promised both himself and Chirrut that if he'd ever come near to danger he'd kill everyone just to make sure Chirrut would stay alive.  
  
He didn't want to kill innocent people, but he knows, perhaps more than he knows anything else, that Chirrut would never be involved in hurting innocent people and so he knew for sure that he'd never have to kill innocent people to keep Chirrut safe.  
  
Chirrut though.. though loving to be reckless and to use his strength to kick assholes in the face, and though Baze had promised he would always be there and would always protect him.. he still found himself being scared a lot of the time. He had found peace and comfort in the force. He knew that all was as the force wanted it to be and that gave him a kind of certainty Baze couldn't give him.  
  
And so when years later they were in their fifties and were fighting on that beach, Chirrut became one with the force again. And when knowing that the only thing that could make this mission a success was to flip the master switch, he knew it was up to him to do.  
  
He walked away from Baze without a word, knowing that Baze could feel just like him that this was the day he died. He walked away with so much pain in his heart but he knew that this was something he had to do.  
  
"I am one with the force and the force is with me." He whispered over and over again. Once he had reached the switch he flipped it. He could hear Baze call his name. He could hear Baze yell for him to get back.  
  
He gripped onto his staff a little tighter and sighed to calm himself before he smiled at his husband, and started walking back.  
  
Suddenly he was on the ground and in a hell of a lot of pain. Baze was next to him, completely panicked as he held him in his arms.  
  
And so Chirrut made him a promise, to take away the panic and to make him know that they would be together again. "Look for the force and you will find me." He said as he reached up his hand. He smiled painfully when Baze took ahold of his hand and then he smiled a little more when he heard Baze say his very well known prayer. "I am one with the force and the force is with me." Baze whispered.  
  
Chirrut could feel himself slipping away. "I love you, Baze." He told him with all the strength he had left.  
  
Baze felt numb. He wanted to cry and hold Chirrut close but they were sitting in the middle of a battlefield. He gently placed Chirrut's body on the ground but he couldn't continue his prayer anymore.  
  
He breathed in deeply, grabbed his gun and stood up. He shot as many troopers as he could in the rage he felt for having to see his husband die.  
  
He didn't come very far until he realised a grenade was about to be thrown and to make sure the others wouldn't get killed he shot the trooper and the grenade landed near him. "I am one with the force and the force is with me." He thought again as he turned around and looked at his husband one last time.  
  
And then he was gone..

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it! Questions/comments/thoughts are always welcome <3


End file.
